January 18, 2012

Hats and Hell

From the Apocolist (down there! It lives at the bottom of the blog):

No. 70: Buy 13 accessories that aren't scarves.

A hat from Aldo Accessories. I've never bought a hat before! 2012: the year of buying stuff I've never bought before.

In other news, I have also been trying to keep up with No. 14 (take a spin class 1x a week) and I have come to the conclusion that my own personal hell would be a spin class that never ended. There is a point during every spin class at which I am pretty sure I'm already dead, that this is my punishment for all those times I yelled "SWEET JESUS IN MOCCASINS" or lied to a kid in order to entertain myself, and that the sweating, burning legs, and crazy woman yelling at me over a strong techno beat will last forever. I become resigned to this idea just as we hit "Track 6" or, as I like to think of it, "The Ninth Circle," and then... sweet, merciful rest! Stretching! And finally, the end.

The world looks a little brighter when you realize you're not yet condemned. It's basically the last 10 minutes of "It's a Wonderful Life" every Wednesday night. I'm not dead! Hooray! I live to spin again! MERRY CHRISTMAS, YOU OLD SAVINGS AND LOAN!

January 13, 2012

Friday the 13th: Time for Tarot!

I don’t know if you know this about me but on top of being generally awesome and interesting I also read and interpret the tarot. I could talk to you for hours about how I feel about them, but the elevator speech is this: I don’t think they’re mystical at all. To me, they’re more directed meditation on an issue in your life. I don’t think anyone should live and die by a reading or that you should feel cheated if the “predicted” outcome doesn’t come true.

Can it be spooky? Yeah. It can seem like the reader knows your innermost thoughts and feelings, but that’s because as you’re having your cards read you are actually paying attention to if those thoughts and feelings are accurate. A reading can help untangle the threads of a problem and face what’s underneath.

Sometimes it’s hard to read my own cards. Sometimes I like to let the internet do it for me! The internet is great, you guys. I use this website with the Llewellyn deck and a celtic cross spread. You might not know what that means, and that’s ok! But I wanted to interpret my reading here because what I found lurking underneath my own top layer was intriguing.

It tells you to ask a question to yourself that you’re grappling with and I asked the following: “Will I ever get a job as a writer?”

Here we go.

1. Position: Cover
Represents: Where I am in relation to the situation
Card: Page of Wands

This card means I'm open to new situations. It's a card of flexibility. Currently I find myself wondering where the future will take me (will we move to Austin? Will I ever be a writer?), and this means I'm open to whatever might happen.

2. Position: Cross
Represents: Positive forces acting in my favor
Card: The Chariot

Ambition! Harnessing energy! Apparently I've got stars in my eyes. To me this means I've been dreaming big recently and can see the potential. I'm in a place where if I wanted to, I could gather the energy to pursue something big.

3. Position: Beneath
Represents: A message from "the higher self". What lies beneath the exterior.
Card: The Four of Cups

Doubt. I feel at a loss as to what can be done about my situation. Sure, there's potential! I've got potential flying out of my butt at high speeds! But that doesn't mean I know what direction to take or where to start.

4. Position: Crown
Represents: Past events; what led to wondering about the situation in the first place.
Card: Queen of Pentacles

Court cards can be cool because they can represent actual people. In this case, a female role-model in my business world. I've been treated well at my job and they have pushed me to become more adept at what I do but not necessarily to be more creative in my work. This has led me to look to other options, like a writing career. Not out of the need to leave a career I hate, but out of the need to push myself further.

5. Position: Behind
Represents: My emotional undercurrent. Unlike the Beneath card, this is all about basic emotion coloring the situation.
Card: The Lovers, Reversed

Longing and frustration. I'm tired of waiting for something to happen that will get me where I need to be.

6. Position: Before
Represents: My relationships with others
Card: Five of Cups

Unfulfilled dreams. I'm disappointed that the networks I live in haven't presented the opportunities I've been hoping for. I've stopped seeing the potential in networking relationships and haven't made any new ones in a while. I might be wallowing a little.

7. Position: Self
Represents: My psychological state and attitude.
Card: Six of Pentacles

Pentacles tend to represent material wealth. I'm open to receiving help. If I were reading this for someone else, I might tell them that the help may come in the form of being supported while they pursue a writing career. But I would not let that happen in my own life. See why it can be hard to read your own cards?

8. Position: House
Represents: My environment and unseen forces influencing the situation.
Card: Six of Cups Reversed

I'm in pleasant company. There are friends surrounding me, even if I don't see them. I am supported by those I love.

9. Position: Hopes and Fears
Represents: My hopes and fears. Duh.
Card: The magician

Freedom and self-rule. One of my longest running hopes is to be self-employed eventually, and this points directly to that. This card also represents talent. I desperately hope that I will someday be a good enough writer to make something work.

10: Position: Outcome
Represents: The outcome of the matter.
Card: Nine of Pentacles Reversed.

Oh dear. Public humiliation by an opportunist? Using others to boost one's self esteem?! BROKEN PROMISES?! COME ON. Ok, I get it. While there are some great things going on in this reading (loving support network, lots of energy), if I take advantage of them or get bogged down by the negatives, things won't work out like I hope. I should avoid the pitfalls of easy opportunity and easy trust. "Go slow, be careful, work hard" seems to be the message of this card.

There you have it. The reading didn't tell me anything I didn't know, but it gave me direction and something to think about.

I'm available for showers and bah mitzvahs. Tell your friends!

January 12, 2012


It's 2012! Our last year on earth, apparently! LET'S DO IT RIGHT.

Here is my list of things to work on when I cant think of anything to do with myself (which is nearly always)(private stuff is ~~~~~):

  1. Body: 3 4,000 foot mountains
  2. Body: Ask more questions about the food I buy.
  3. Body: Be mindful of portions
  4. Body: Drink 8 glasses of water daily. Use the rubber bands.
  5. Body: Eat more green things.
  6. Body: Eat more slowly
  7. Body: Find glasses that suit me
  8. Body: Heal the foot!
  9. Body: Improve posture.
  10. Body: More weight training
  11. Body: Refill Celexa prescription with regularity. Take it daily.
  12. Body: Run 3x a week
  13. Body: Run a 10k
  14. Body: Spin class
  15. Body: Yoga once a week
  16. Career: Complete task list each week
  17. Career: Drink tea 3x / week
  18. Career: Eat lunch with people once a week
  19. Career: Have a team night out
  20. Career: Keep the lab clean
  21. Career: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
  22. Career: Reply, sort, or delete e-mail more quickly.
  23. Career: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
  24. Career: Stress more discreetly
  25. Career: Travel to source
  26. Creativity: Knitting night
  27. Creativity: Buy a camera
  28. Creativity: Buy a recorder
  29. Creativity: Don’t be afraid to stay up late if you’re being productive
  30. Creativity: Sew one handbag.
  31. Creativity: Knit 20 things
  32. Creativity: Send letters to your pen-pal
  33. Creativity: Try to write a poem again
  34. Creativity: Write once a week
  35. Finance: Drink out less, drink in more.
  36. Finance: Eat leftovers more.
  37. Finance: Save dividend until I find something good to do with it.
  38. Finance: Save tax return until I find something good to do with it.
  39. Finance: Stop wasting money.
  40. Finance: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
  41. Mind: Do one social thing once a week, as long as it’s something I’ll enjoy.
  42. Mind: Don’t be afraid to stay up late reading.
  43. Mind: Go to the symphony/ballet/opera
  44. Mind: Lie less
  45. Mind: Practice patience.
  46. Mind: Read 20 books, whether they’re classics or not. Keep track of them.
  47. Mind: Say “yes” to 2 out of 3 new opportunities.
  48. Mind: Start journaling again
  49. Mind: Take a language class
  50. Mind: Take a design class
  51. Organization: Buy a proper needle case
  52. Organization: Clean up after I use the kitchen
  53. Organization: Declutter EVERYTHING
  54. Organization: Get a cover for the couch
  55. Organization: Keep my space cleaner
  56. Organization: Organize the stash somehow.
  57. Organization: Skype with Kathryn once a week
  58. Organization: Use Pinterest to organize inspiration
  59. Relationships: Be more available to family
  60. Relationships: Buy Tom a thoughtful birthday gift
  61. Relationships: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
  62. Relationships: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
  63. Relationships: Invite dad to the house for dinner
  64. Relationships: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
  65. Relationships: Stop and talk to people who stop and talk to you.
  66. Relationships: Take a trip with April
  67. Relationships: Take Bear on a mystery trip
  68. Relationships: Visit grams and gramps 3x
  69. Style: buy 1 piece of jewelry a month from a thrift store
  70. Style: Buy 13 new accessories, 10 of which aren’t scarves.
  71. Style: buy 5 pieces for wardrobe inspired by Pinterest picks
  72. Style: Buy less impulsively, style more.
  73. Style: Buy shoes that I can wear all day that look good.
  74. Style: Buy simple layer pieces that pop
  76. Style: Get clothes tailored / fixed / dry-cleaned that need to be
  77. Style: Memorize all 37 scarf tying methods
  78. Style: Own a set of pajamas.
  79. Style: Simplify and find favorite extras (liquid eyeliner, eye shadow palette, lip stain)
  80. Style: Simplify and find favorite nightly/daily beauty products
  81. Sustainability: always carry shopping bags
  82. Sustainability: No paper cups
  83. Sustainability: use travel mug more
  84. Sustainability: Better cosmetics
  85. Whimsy: Adventure out of the state
  86. Whimsy: Camping with Kathryn and others
  87. Whimsy: Encyclopedia Hysterica
  88. Whimsy: Get a pedi with someone
  89. Whimsy: Learn how to do a back walk-over
  90. Whimsy: Listen to music in the background more.
  91. Whimsy: Rent a fancy car to go somewhere fancy (maybe to tea!)
  92. Whimsy: Send flowers to mom/ Nancy/ Gramma N./ Gramma L./ Kris once each this year
  93. Whimsy: Spa day with ladyfriend
  94. Whimsy: Start a window herb garden
  95. Whimsy: Take a ballet class
  96. Whimsy: Tea at the Viking
  97. Whimsy: Have folks over for brunch as often as possible
  98. Whimsy: Try 100 new foods
  99. Whimsy: Try 6 new restaurants
  100. Whimsy: Visit museums in Providence
I will let you know how it goes! Woo! I WILL NEVER BE BORED AGAIN.